Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

You are the third derivative of the position function.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Jess Burns

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

Scott

RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Hahahahahhaha...................................black people

how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

tim tebow is a great quarterback

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...