A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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Why did the priest renew his...SHIT, A BEAR!!

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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Why couldn't Peter climb the tree? Because he's a fish.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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A Jew, an Atheist, and a Muslim walk into a bar. They each drink a bottle, have a conversation, and leave.

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blubber vaginass CC

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What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Why was Billy sad? An evil clown hit him with an Axe.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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Woman : Child,what time is it? Child : I'm not a kid, I Broccoli.

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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