knock knock go away

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

blubber vaginass CC

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Chuck Norris died.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's in there? Get outta there...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Is your refrigerator running? No. Oh perfect, I'm a refrigerator repairman, I'll be right over.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I am the sun. You are the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the woman die Because she was old

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

thumb_up thumb_down -1

your fat

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did the man become sterilized? Blow-dart through the testicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

balls in ya mouf

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops