the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

What do you call a Mexican mixed with a platypus? a pineapple

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

Kate

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

What is the difference between men and women? Several physical functions such has the reproductive systems, bone structure, and voice pitch.

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

Knock Knock Come in!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

my aunt Always used to say"go with the flow" she died in a kayak accident last Sunday

Kenny G

A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

NEVER

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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