There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

thumb_up thumb_down -1

is this love , is this love , is this love , that im feeling , no bob im afraid its cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call an epileptic in a bowl? James, if that happens to be his name.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you stop a train? you cant..

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Jonathan is like a btterfly. They're both asianu

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

CHEEZECAKE

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many Somalians can you fit in a Shopping trolley? Well rather unfortunately there is a lack of Shopping Centers in Somalia due to its corrupt government and its general poverty in comparison to a 1st world country, needless to mention the civil wars. I would guess 7 though.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I like jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

they make me sick. i hate them all with their big noses. they should all be rounded up and............... Oh I'm sorry, i thought this was anti-jew.com

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hair

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops