What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

What is the difference between a black guy and an asian? They are both black, except the asian

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

wanna hear a joke? no

what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

So a seal walks into a club...

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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