There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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France never surrender.

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Liars go to hell! -God

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Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ..To get to the other side

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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A man walked into a bar, he spilled his drink.

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-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

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A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

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What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

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An Amish walks into Best Buy

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops