What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

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NEVER

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

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AND

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There once was a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe He got a slight case of sunburn which improved later after applying some ointment.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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DERP

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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So, this one time, I was at the grocery store. Man, that was nuts.

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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your fat

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what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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