What do u call a black person in your backyard? Mufasa

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How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

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A moth walks into a podiatrist's office. The podiatrist says, "Moth, what's the problem?" And the moth says, "What's the problem. Well, doc, where do I begin? Every day I get up to another cruel sky. It's like the sun is mocking me as I begin the gruelling preparations for another 8-hours of slogging in meaningless toil for my boss, Gregor McIvanichisky. A grey self, captive in a grey cubicle in a grey office with no windows that I might see the grey clouds beyond... I just sit in my cubicle as I feel the throbbing ache of the best days of my life being raped away into a monotonous, forgettable slurry of irrelevant corporate drudgery. I don't know what I'm doing, I don't think my boss even knows. All he knows is that he has power over me. And my children...my daughter is always on her cellphone, texting and emailing. I haven't spoken real words to her in weeks. My oldest son is never home and when he is, he's locked in his room listening to angry music. My youngest son, he's only 4, I look at him and he asks me to play... and I feel nothing. No love, no tenderness... just a void. And when I look in the mirror...I don't recognize the face staring back at me. It's aged so much from the boyish looks I remember. The years have carved deep lines of despair, worry and anguish. Dark, hollow eyes where once gleamed hope and excitement. Thin lips unable to find the smile of the happy, old days. If only I could find the courage to reach over to the side table and remove the loaded gun. And then find the strength to pull back that hammer as the chamber rotates, clicking solidly into place...Raising it to my temple for the final squeeze that will erase the last shreds of my existence from this cold grave of a life wasted away." And the podiatrist says, "Well, Moth, you're in pretty rough shape. You need to get some help. But why did you come to me? You need a psychiatrist!!" And the moth says... "Because the light was on."

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whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

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i saw a garbage truck it had garbage in it

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What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

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am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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Ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter? Whatever his name is?

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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I was having sex with my girlfriend the other night and she called me a pedofile. i told her that was a pretty big word for a 9 year old.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

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they make me sick. i hate them all with their big noses. they should all be rounded up and............... Oh I'm sorry, i thought this was anti-jew.com

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what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

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There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, but he's dead.

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

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how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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