- Anti Joke

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

A moth walks into a podiatrist's office. The podiatrist says, "Moth, what's the problem?" And the moth says, "What's the problem. Well, doc, where do I begin? Every day I get up to another cruel sky. It's like the sun is mocking me as I begin the gruelling preparations for another 8-hours of slogging in meaningless toil for my boss, Gregor McIvanichisky. A grey self, captive in a grey cubicle in a grey office with no windows that I might see the grey clouds beyond... I just sit in my cubicle as I feel the throbbing ache of the best days of my life being raped away into a monotonous, forgettable slurry of irrelevant corporate drudgery. I don't know what I'm doing, I don't think my boss even knows. All he knows is that he has power over me. And my children...my daughter is always on her cellphone, texting and emailing. I haven't spoken real words to her in weeks. My oldest son is never home and when he is, he's locked in his room listening to angry music. My youngest son, he's only 4, I look at him and he asks me to play... and I feel nothing. No love, no tenderness... just a void. And when I look in the mirror...I don't recognize the face staring back at me. It's aged so much from the boyish looks I remember. The years have carved deep lines of despair, worry and anguish. Dark, hollow eyes where once gleamed hope and excitement. Thin lips unable to find the smile of the happy, old days. If only I could find the courage to reach over to the side table and remove the loaded gun. And then find the strength to pull back that hammer as the chamber rotates, clicking solidly into place...Raising it to my temple for the final squeeze that will erase the last shreds of my existence from this cold grave of a life wasted away." And the podiatrist says, "Well, Moth, you're in pretty rough shape. You need to get some help. But why did you come to me? You need a psychiatrist!!" And the moth says... "Because the light was on."

What's funnier than 24? 25

whats the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? i dont have a ferrari in my garage

Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

Why did Sally go to McDonalds? Because she felt like it

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

87

why did the black man eat two buckets of fried chicken? because he was hungry and he likes fried chicken

how many scrubbers does it take to change a lightbulb 2, 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell like urine.

What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

Why did the baby cross the road? I don't know but it got hit by a semi during.

Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

An Amish walks into Best Buy

What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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