Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan.

What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

whats worse than one bee sting... two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings... the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust... three bee stings

A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

A drunk guy walks into a bar and falls flat on his back. Upset, he then finds a bathroom. An hour later he is arrested for beating off in the bathroom. off is pressing charges.

A joke

Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

A deer walked into a hunter's bar... and was shot.

How do you drown a blonde? Hold their head under water.

Chuck Norris died.

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

a man walked into a bar and said ow

What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

''Wanna hear a joke?'' ''Sure'' ''a joke''

Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...