How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

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Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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George W. Bush

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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