Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter? Whatever his name is?

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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-Why Peter is going to mall for buying some beer? -Because he was 18 and he was able to do it.

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A man walked into a bar, he spilled his drink.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

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what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

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A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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mitt romney

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Women's rights.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say mustache? ...No. I wish you had said mustache.

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Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops