Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

I wish I Charlie Sheen's Dealer.

To pen state administraters walk into a butt

What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

ASSCHEEKS

Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

Hair

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

If shes old enough to count..... Then having sex with her would be considered illegal.

An Amish walks into Best Buy

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

62

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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