What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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JUSTIN BEING SMART

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How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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