I like your hair

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knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

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women's rights

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knock knock go away

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? The jew is a human being while the pizza is a combination of things such as sauce, bread, cheese and many other toppings made available to the buyer

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing, the black person was sleeping.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

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Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

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How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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