One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

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Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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BIG PENIS

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how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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AND

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Ruller

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

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whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

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Asians...

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Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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