I'm Spartacus

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France never surrender.

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Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? An apple in your anti-joke

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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Baaaaaaahhhhhh

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter? Whatever his name is?

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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A man walked into a bar, he spilled his drink.

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

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what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

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You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

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A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

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Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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mitt romney

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

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A dad is very proud of his son for just having graduated preschool. he tells him son, ill get you anything you want. he says i want a pink pingpong ball. the dad is confused but he does it anyway. the next year, he graduates kindergarten. the dad asks the same question. the son this time says i want 10 pink pingpong balls. so the dad, very confused, does it. 5 years later, he graduates elementary school. this time he says 100 pink pingpong balls. high school the dad says cmon your going to college ANYTHING! A CAR? A HOUSE? no i want 1,000 pink pingpong balls. the kid then goes to college and 4 years later and majors in african relief. the dad is very proud but he says. lemme guess? 10,000 pink ping pong balls? YEP. the kid goes to africa to help out because he's a good person. he then meets his wife helping out there also. they get married and the dad flies out to africa to see the wedding. he then knows that he needs 100,000 pink pingpong balls shipped in. the dad goes back to the US and 9 months later finds out that he is a grandfather. he ships 1,000,000 pink ping pong balls into africa. a few years later he finds out that his son contracted a rare african disease and is going to die very soon. now the father is deeply in debt from all the ping pong balls, so his community helps him raise money to go to africa. he meets his son on his death bed. and they talk for a long time. the dad finally says. yknow son i really need to ask you, why did you ask for all those ping pong balls? the son says: "Well dad, I--" and then he dies

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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