What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

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Women's rights

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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women's rights

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

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What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

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"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

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A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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