A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? Answer: A Pilot

Wanna hear a joke? No.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

Goat balls.

Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

Scott

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was a woman.

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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