Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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Why was the black man shot, He resisted against a highly political challenger. Unfortunately for him the Armenian politician was not a very nice guy.

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amy copied adams haircut :0

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Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

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What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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