Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

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Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

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PEN15 IF U R SMART U WILL UNDERSTAND THIS

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

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Five guys one rape.

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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