Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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How are Steve Jobs and the iPhone similar? They both keep getting thinner as time goes on.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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Laura Pratz..

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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noodles

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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what do you do when you see a priest in a bar? tell him that is un richeous and he shall pay for his sins right before you kill him

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

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An Amish walks into Best Buy

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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