Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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An Amish walks into Best Buy

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What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

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Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

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how do you kill a rich blonde? give her black die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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