Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

If life throws you lemons Catch them

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

Chuck Norris died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...