how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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your fat

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Womens Sports

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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dfsgdf g dsf g sdfg sdf gsd fg sdfg s df g sdf gs df g sdf g sdfg sdf g sdfgsadg awetrawefads f asdf asdrfasrg sdf nfghjml ho ;l jkm gascSDagfgh dj gf hdfgh khdkfgkfgkj gjkf g afg adf g dfgs df g sd fg s dfg sdfg df g sdf g s df gsdf g sdf g f t r j yu k yuilk yiol o l rt wer t wer t we t w e rt w er

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

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Do you want to hear a knock knock joke? (Yes) Okay, you start. (Knock knock). Who's there? ...

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How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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Five guys one rape.

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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