How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

Women's rights.

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

Knock Knock, Come in.

Goat balls.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...