What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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What do you call a black pilot? a pilot you racist bastard...

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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9/11.

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Why was the Asian man told to open his eyes? He was sleeping.

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A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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