why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

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mitt romney

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Five guys one rape.

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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whats worse than the holocaust??? finding it in your apple

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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Women's rights.

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what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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ceiling mounted bonerss CC

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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