How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

To whomever it may concern, You are currently reading this anonymous letter from someone anonymous. I’m currently watching you read this letter. I am not a threat. I am not Big Brother. I am someone anonymous. You will never find out who I am. You may have a few ideas of who this might be, but you will be wrong. Just know that I am watching you. That is all. I love you. All for Jesus -A

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Do you want to hear a knock knock joke? (Yes) Okay, you start. (Knock knock). Who's there? ...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

what color is blue? green

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

thumb_up thumb_down -90

One day there was a guy who went on a date with a girl. They went to the movies and ate popcorn. After the movie ended they had a candlelit dinner at a restaurant nearby. The guy ordered a fried chicken and the girl ordered a watermelon salad. They went home after a great dinner. I'm not sure how the story ends but I remember the story was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

thumb_up thumb_down -122

You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -122

What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Whats tan and jumps higher than a frog? Mexicans..

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

a black guy with rights in 1924

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops