Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

A man sat down Then he stood up

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

What's worse than being raped? Being raped after getting raped.

Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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