How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

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How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

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Two Jews walk in a bar...

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

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noodles

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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whats the difference between a white man and a black man? I like cake

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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women's rights

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

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Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face" the horse says "my son was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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