What didn't last long? You in the bed

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Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

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NEVER

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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French people.

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

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Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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The

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Rick Perry.

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

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Female Athletics

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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