Knock Knock, Come in.

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

4 African men walk into a convientent store, withdrawal 50$ from there primary bank accounts and buy gas for the ride to there jobs at McDonalds

What is bad at catch The twin towers

What does Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobil? ... - Come on Robin, let's get into the Batmobil...

WOMEN'S RIGHTS

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

French people.

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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