I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

Oh...okay, good.

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

how do you kill a rich blonde? give her black die

So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

I like your hair

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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