What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

thumb_up thumb_down -37

So this blonde walks into a library.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Hi Danny it's Louis Tehe

thumb_up thumb_down -127

What was wrong with the black guy? He was black

thumb_up thumb_down +98

What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

I can't see my forehead

thumb_up thumb_down +56

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Carlton

thumb_up thumb_down +44

your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What's funny? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

thumb_up thumb_down +30

whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops