How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Are you from Jamacia? Because I want to have sex with you.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

thumb_up thumb_down +21

whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

thumb_up thumb_down +19

little billy has 50 chocolete bars, he eats 45 of them. what does he have now? diabetes, little billy has diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

French people.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops