How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

What's wrong with the muffler man? his body.

Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

What did the pauper want for Christmas? Money

The Mets win the World Series

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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