Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

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Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

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What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

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What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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