Look at your hand. Made you look!

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where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

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Roses are red Violets are blue

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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Female Athletics

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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apple pie.

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noodles

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What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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What do you call a black pilot? a pilot you racist bastard...

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

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Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

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Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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