What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -59

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

thumb_up thumb_down -69

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

A racist indian (from india) walks into a bar (in india). A catholic priest walks into the same bar. The bar says 'moo'. The bar is a shape-shifting cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Magic Johnson has AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Netball.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops