How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why was the man killed before he could finish his anti joke? Because he

thumb_up thumb_down +87

62

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

No.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops