Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

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9/11.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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Q:Which way do gay people walk? A:In One Direction

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How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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Tia is a dumb website. Turn 0ff blah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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