Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

French people.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

What do you call a dinosaur with no teeth? He's British

DERP

A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

guess what?

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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