-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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NEVER

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What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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What is as dry as a bone? A bone

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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French people.

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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The Mets win the World Series

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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Female Athletics

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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