what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

guess what?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

ASSCHEEKS

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops