Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

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why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

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guess what?

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A man sat down Then he stood up

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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P0P T4Rt

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

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Hair

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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Why didn't the blond walk into the bar? Because she saw 2 other people get hurt so she ducked

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What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

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So a seal walks into a club...

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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