What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

NEVER

What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

French people.

The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

What do you call your mother? Mom.

What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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