there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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The.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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What did one eye say to the other? Nothing. Because eye's can't talk.

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Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

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Two Jews walk in a bar...

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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