Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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why did the chicken cross the road

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Scott

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Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

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The.

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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