WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

Women's rights.

Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

a black guy with rights in 1924

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

What is a chinese person in your house? A human being

Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

Whats a cat? A cat!

The.

How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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