Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot her.

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What do you tell a woman with no black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice but you're not an abusive partner.

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Why did the man go to jail? He abused and later murdered his spouse.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

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Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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