What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

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What's the difference between a baby and cheese? I don't like cheese in my sandwiches.

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What is as dry as a bone? A bone

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

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Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

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French people.

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guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

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What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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hi bye

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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