How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

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what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

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there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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What is the difference between a monkey and a pig? A monkey doesn't snort drugs.

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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Do you want to hear a joke about dogs? A joke about dogs.

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Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

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Why was the man killed before he could finish his anti joke? Because he

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Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

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A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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