What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? A police officer.

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

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A joke

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Expensive cheese.

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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The Bible

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Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Duck Season" Elmer: "Wabbit Season" Buggs: "Wabbit Season" Elmer: Bang

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Is your refrigerator running? No. Oh perfect, I'm a refrigerator repairman, I'll be right over.

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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