what's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm ? finding a half worm.

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Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

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what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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Asians...

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

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How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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Female Athletics

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The Bible

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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what rhymes with sloth? rape

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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