LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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So a seal walks into a club...

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops