A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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womens rights

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

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Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

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What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

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Lacrosse

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knock knock whos there? doctor doctor who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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