Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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Goat balls.

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

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whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your other apple.

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what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

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Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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Why did the man go to space? He was a highly trained astronaut

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Q:How do you make an accountant cry ? A: You kill his whole family

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Two corpses weigh in the wind. One is called Jones.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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What did the pickle say to the cucumber? I am you from the future!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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