What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

apple pie.

Roses are red Violets are blue

To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

noodles

The

What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

P0P T4Rt

How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

Hair

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it.

Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

Q: What's a fish store with no fish? A: A water store.

Hi Danny it's Louis Tehe

Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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