Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

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A man sees a giant talking frog walk into a store. He later dies due to an overdose of LSD.

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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Knock. Knock. No one is home. Okay.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

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What's 1+1? 4.

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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9/11.

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What do you think about whats happening in the middle east right now? You're an idiot.

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Did you hear the joke about the deaf man? Neither did he.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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