what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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Scott

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If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

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The.

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

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Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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