What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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What do you call a tree on fire? A burning tree.

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JUSTIN BEING SMART

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

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Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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My life

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What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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The

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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