I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: It doesn't matter, the lightbulb never went out in the first place.

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Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

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What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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Justin Bieber saying "shawty"

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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What's 6 + 9? 15.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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