Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? You grab a ladder and help them down.

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How many babies does it take to fill a ditch? Six if you pack them in really tight.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After be told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, Chuck walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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Why did the fat black man call the fatter white man. Because they were good friends and liked to talk.

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Q : Why did the girl fall off the swimset ? A : Gravity pulls smaller masses towards larger masses, so the girl being the smaller mass, got attracted to the bigger mass, AKA the Earth, and that's why she fell.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

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Two men walk into a bar. Seeing as the first man could have suffered a concussion, and been seriously hurt, The second man ducks to avoid also being hit by the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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