What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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Anti jokes are funny, but also not.

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

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noodles

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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Why couldn't the kid go into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13 and he was only 11!

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How do you act when you discover that the 'Submit' button doesn't work? Wait for a while until the problem fixes itself and you are able to perform the desired function.

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Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Womens Sports

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wat?

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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Whats the difference between Justin Beiber and Polio? Polio was cured.

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We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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