What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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How did the blonde die? She got slurped up by a 1,000-foot anteater. How did the 1,000-foot anteater die? He got slurped up a 10,000 foot anteatereater. How did the 10,000 foot anteatereater die? It doesn't matter. The Earth just got slurped up by a one-trillion-foot planeteater.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Eggplant.

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What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic, it's destroying his family.

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How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

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Yo momma is so fat, she has to wear a large shirt

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I believe you, if something is possible, I know you can do it. I tried lucid dreaming once, but I felt like I began floating and that was no fun, scared me. I am pretty good at hypnotizing others, myself not so much.

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How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

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A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

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2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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