What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

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A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

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Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

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Knock Knock! we have a door bell ...ding dong. its broken.

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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What is the difference between a joke and an antijoke? An antijoke does not have a punch line.

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Why did the deer hunter shoot a deer? He told his wife he bought a new TV.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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What did the dog say to its anus? Woof

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

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How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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