how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

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What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

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The

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The Bible

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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What's 1+1? 4.

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where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

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45.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

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what color is blue? green

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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