What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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Why did Madelyn leave the space next ot the computer? Because her hat got tooken from her.

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Q: whats worse than a worm in an apple? A: being raped by a giant scorpian

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What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

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where do you find a dog with no brain? in its grave.

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Never mind, it's just an imaginary door anyway.

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He cheated at boggle.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? One's a black man and one's a pizza.

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

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Why did the retard have no friends? Because somebody stitched his mouth and eyes shut so he couldn't be social.

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what color is blue? green

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why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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Hey! i just thought of the funniest joke! okay so it goes like this: A man was walking down the street and saw a bar... he walked in and.... yeah, thats about it.....

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

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Five guys one rape.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Vodka is cheaper that dinner for two.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

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A dad is very proud of his son for just having graduated preschool. he tells him son, ill get you anything you want. he says i want a pink pingpong ball. the dad is confused but he does it anyway. the next year, he graduates kindergarten. the dad asks the same question. the son this time says i want 10 pink pingpong balls. so the dad, very confused, does it. 5 years later, he graduates elementary school. this time he says 100 pink pingpong balls. high school the dad says cmon your going to college ANYTHING! A CAR? A HOUSE? no i want 1,000 pink pingpong balls. the kid then goes to college and 4 years later and majors in african relief. the dad is very proud but he says. lemme guess? 10,000 pink ping pong balls? YEP. the kid goes to africa to help out because he's a good person. he then meets his wife helping out there also. they get married and the dad flies out to africa to see the wedding. he then knows that he needs 100,000 pink pingpong balls shipped in. the dad goes back to the US and 9 months later finds out that he is a grandfather. he ships 1,000,000 pink ping pong balls into africa. a few years later he finds out that his son contracted a rare african disease and is going to die very soon. now the father is deeply in debt from all the ping pong balls, so his community helps him raise money to go to africa. he meets his son on his death bed. and they talk for a long time. the dad finally says. yknow son i really need to ask you, why did you ask for all those ping pong balls? the son says: "Well dad, I--" and then he dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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