What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Where does a hobo live? A box.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red, Violet are blue. I just thought I'd let you know, But don't worry- this isn't a poem.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Oscar masturbate? He was on life support?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a man that is half Chinese and half Irish? Whatever you want, he's deaf so he won't be able to hear you anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops