What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between a Jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a fireplace while Jews are functioning members of society

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Hey! i just thought of the funniest joke! okay so it goes like this: A man was walking down the street and saw a bar... he walked in and.... yeah, thats about it.....

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -69

wanna hear a joke? no

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Q. how many Americans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? A. usually it only takes one, but if the ladders is unsteady he might need one or two friends to help hold the ladder

thumb_up thumb_down -87

What do you call a Mexican worked with a sweaty singlet? A Wetback

thumb_up thumb_down -137

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +120

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down +36

your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops