How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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The.

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Your mom.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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