What did Obama do when he heard of Bin Ladins death? He informed the nation of what had happend.

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Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

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Once upon of time an old man goes to a hospital and tells the doctor that he wants to get circumcised for the first time. The doctor says "Are you sure, you are 90 years old" and the old man says "please doc, just do it." So he goes on with the procedure and the old man is very happy. He returns home with his foreskin and keeps it inside a small box. The old man goes out for dinner and comes home to see his foreskin missing. He gets very angry and asked his daughter "Have you seen my little box?" Daughter says no. He asked his son-in-law "Did you take my box with my foreskin?" Son in law says "No, never." The old man asks the dog "Doggie, did you take my foreskin?" The dog says "Why yes, yes I did." The old man angrily says "Well give it back!" The dog says "I will give your foreskin back if you do me one favor." The old man says "What is it?" The dog says "Three blocks down the street there is a purple house with a cute dog that I would like you to bring to me to go on a date with. Bring her to me and I'll give you back the box." So the old man walks three blocks down the street and spots the purple house. He knocks on the door and a woman opens the door. The old man asks "Excuse me ma'am, i just got circumsized yesterday and I was wondering if I can borrow your dog for just one night because my dog some how blackmailed me and kept my foreskin and said that if I can get my dog and your dog together he would give me my foreskin back." The woman replies " Who the FFFFF are you?!!!"

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What is funnier than shooting a man in the face? Most things, shooting a man in the face is a terrible crime.

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knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

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What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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99% of guys are hot. The other 1% go to my school.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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