What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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The.

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Your mom.

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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what did the orphan get for Christmas? a family

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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ceiling mounted bonerss CC

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How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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Why did the boy get hit by a car? Because he didn't look both ways

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Kim Kardashian.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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Austin. kid with long hair, sat next to paymon who had short hair. "Go cut ur hair." "ok"

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roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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