- Anti Joke

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

Your mom.

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

what happened to the christian when he died? nothing because god isnt real.

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

My life

The Bible

Women's Rights...

45.

why was the boy mad somebody was liking his foot

Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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