Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout boy scouts come back from camp

did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

The Mets win the World Series

Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

Two Jews walk in a bar...

Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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