Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

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Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

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A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

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I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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Laura Pratz..

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My life

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What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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Why does the Easter Bunny deliver chocolate eggs? Because

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why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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