Once upon of time an old man goes to a hospital and tells the doctor that he wants to get circumcised for the first time. The doctor says "Are you sure, you are 90 years old" and the old man says "please doc, just do it." So he goes on with the procedure and the old man is very happy. He returns home with his foreskin and keeps it inside a small box. The old man goes out for dinner and comes home to see his foreskin missing. He gets very angry and asked his daughter "Have you seen my little box?" Daughter says no. He asked his son-in-law "Did you take my box with my foreskin?" Son in law says "No, never." The old man asks the dog "Doggie, did you take my foreskin?" The dog says "Why yes, yes I did." The old man angrily says "Well give it back!" The dog says "I will give your foreskin back if you do me one favor." The old man says "What is it?" The dog says "Three blocks down the street there is a purple house with a cute dog that I would like you to bring to me to go on a date with. Bring her to me and I'll give you back the box." So the old man walks three blocks down the street and spots the purple house. He knocks on the door and a woman opens the door. The old man asks "Excuse me ma'am, i just got circumsized yesterday and I was wondering if I can borrow your dog for just one night because my dog some how blackmailed me and kept my foreskin and said that if I can get my dog and your dog together he would give me my foreskin back." The woman replies " Who the FFFFF are you?!!!"

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

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Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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haw are alligators and turtles simaler? They are both reptiles and carnavores and their speaces goes all the way back to the dinosoar ages

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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Are you a homophobe? No I'm straight. ,.

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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I love you.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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