A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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What is a cow's favorite place to go? The slaughterhouse.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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guess what?

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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9/11.

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1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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