What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you kill a blonde? well there are several way's in which to kill another human being, infact, the point that she is blonde is rather irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How Long is a Chinese man.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's big and black? A black fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Like my status for a tbh?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

The joke below me is retarded

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what goes oom oom a cow walking backwards

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why is justin bieber gay? because he is attracted to men

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did liam weir ask ethan. how much charge do you have

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops