Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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make me a sandwich!

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What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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What's long brown and sticky? S**t

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Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

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Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? People posting the same joke over and over again.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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A: Knock, knock. B:Who's there? A: It's your neighbor, Sam. B: Oh, well my extended family is over for dinner at the moment. Would you mind coming back later? A: I suppose that would be alright.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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