How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

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whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

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what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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I AM DISSAPOINTED

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make me a sandwich!

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

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A man comes home late from work what does he find? His wife and children murdered.

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A black man without problems.

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why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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What's long brown and sticky? S**t

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why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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Popsicles

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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