What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

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How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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The AIDS patient was gay

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What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

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A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

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whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

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who just made fun of katie matt

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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I AM DISSAPOINTED

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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make me a sandwich!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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