Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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What has an extra toe and is a bad role model for little girls? Miley Cyrus.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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wanna hear a joke? no

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

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Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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