What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

Why can black people jump shoot and steal? Because society’s stereotypes have influenced people in thinking that African Americans can jump really high, shoot a basketball well and commit theft.

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

Like my status for a tbh?

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

Q. What's like a square block of ice? A. A refrigerator.

Q- why are anti-jokes funny? A- cuz

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

Kim Kardashian.

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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