Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

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hrih

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who farted i did :]

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once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

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A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

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what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

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I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll it be?" His friends are very concerned about his sanity.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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