What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

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My mom touched my wiener : \

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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69.... is a number

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Gay rights

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black

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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