Where to, sir? Forward.

Q: What do you call cheese that is not yours? A: Cheese at the grocery store that you have not purchased yet

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

69.... is a number

What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

Poop.

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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