The joke below me is retarded

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what's white, sticky, and very fluffy? which can be sweet or bitter, depending on what the person ate. THATS RIGHT. it's CUM. :D

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why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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what did one cow say to the other cow. nothing as its mouth was filled with grass thus it could not speak or it would be deemed as rude.

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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What did mike Tyson say to the midget? ''Hello'' He's actually a relatively nice man.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

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guess what?

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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