what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

It's funny, because she's twice his size!

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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