Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

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How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

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What's black and white, and red all over ? An interracial couple who were both gruesomely decapitated in a freak car accident.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops