Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

Your mom is so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...