Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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Your mama's so dumb, she don't even know it.

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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Why did the black guy enjoy anal sex? Because he has a phobia of vaginas and only likes to have anal

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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