What has two arms, and two legs but cant walk? A Cripple

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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Diana and victoria

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

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Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

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What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops