doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

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Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

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Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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