how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

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What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

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What's worse than going to boot camp? - going to concentration camp.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

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Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

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My mom touched my wiener : \

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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Poop.

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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