Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock knock Who's there? Happy 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Dislike if you're a virgin ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -112

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

thumb_up thumb_down -126

what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

thumb_up thumb_down -132

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops