What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree there was no monkey

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

Why are all black people considered to be relatively fleet of foot as contrasted to other races? Because their gene pool contains a higher frequency for the traits of low body fat and high proportions of musculature.

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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