A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

Whats skinny, round, tall, smells like a dead baby, hard, small, and fat? nothing

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

Hitler. lol, sucks.

Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

Gay rights

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

Yo Mamma

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

my names jim haha

YOLO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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