Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

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worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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