Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

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Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

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How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

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how do you refer to a guy with a backwards baseball cap and leather jacket and low riding? by his first name

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

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Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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