knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and was forced to prostitute for money, thus resulting in you.

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Politics.

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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why did the black man drown? he cant swim

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How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops