What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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Poop.

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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A black man without problems.

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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9/11

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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what color is blue? green

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doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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A racist indian (from india) walks into a bar (in india). A catholic priest walks into the same bar. The bar says 'moo'. The bar is a shape-shifting cow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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what do you call a black man in a police car? A police officer

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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