Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

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Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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Knock knock

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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