Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A black man without problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

thumb_up thumb_down -114

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

thumb_up thumb_down -124

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

thumb_up thumb_down +89

What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

minorities

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops