Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

what happens when you wake up inception

Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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