What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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What did it say in the end of the book? The End.

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What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Meanwhile, at La'kaneisha's family reunion, they had a great time eating caviar, steamed lobster, and rare bull testicals.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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Knock Knock, Come in.

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Arrow to the Knee

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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