What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine [Emo Philips]

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What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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Where does a hobo live? A box.

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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a man walks into a bar and dies

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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