Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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Once upon a time, there was a potato named Ollie. Ollie was confused, because potatoes shouldn't have brains. One day, Ollie fell madly in love with a refridgerator named Bob. Chick-Fil-A killed both of them for being homosexuals. Chick-Fil-A then ate some Oreoes. The end.

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whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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Yo Mamma

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Politics.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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