What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

what happens when you wake up inception

worst name for a club in alaska club baby seal

Women's Rights

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

Hi my name is Bob

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Where you last put it.

Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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