Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

Womens Basketball.

How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

What's worse than getting full-blown AIDS? Nothing.

What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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