Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

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What do you call a black man selling drugs? average

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A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

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knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

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Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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You and your wife walk into a bar, you both order a drink and celebrate your good health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops