What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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What's black and white and red all over? A exploding zebra.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

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Magic Johnson has AIDS

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

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"Ask me if I'm an orange!" "Are you an orange?" "No."

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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