what color is blue? green

why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him access to food stamps

Have you ever had sex with a woman (or several at once) and suddenly thought somethi... Moral: Nevermind, like you ever had sex! LOL!

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

How Long is a Chinese man.

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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