What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

a man walks into a bar and dies

A fairly-priced Apple computer.

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

Hey, you have small hands.

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

Hi my name is Bob

What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

i have cancer

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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