When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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Guess what? SHADAP

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

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Politics.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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