A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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my names jim haha

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A black man without problems.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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