How do you make someone to go away from you? You rap3 them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rap3 him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rap3 him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

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what happened to the boy who asked for a hit from the bong? he got punched in the face.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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Why is Travis so hilarious? ....Trick question hes not.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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Why did the black guy enjoy anal sex? Because he has a phobia of vaginas and only likes to have anal

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Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

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I like turtoes.

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

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All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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