Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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What's worst then not getting anything on Christmas? Rape, Murder, Dying.

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

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America Votes

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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I know animal testing is cruel, but my dog did really well on the SATs.

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Why? Because racecar.

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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My nipple is bleeding

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

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What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? One is a mythical person who parents exploit to get their children to behave due to lack of parenting skills.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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