doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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21

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Sean Nuneviller look him up, he's cute.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

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Whats a cat? A cat!

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So a black guy walks into a bar, respectively pays his tab and walks out.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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