A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

I'm funny.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

What did one pole say to the other pole? We are both from poland

A unicorn is walking down the street and a man asks him: "Why so horny" The unicorn then slap the man upside the head because that was none of his business.

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

What's funnier than 24? 25.

what's black, white, and red all over? any red object

What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

Q: what do you call a phone that's fake? A: a phony...

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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