Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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my names jim haha

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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21

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knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

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Have you seen Stevie wonder's new mansion? No..... Either has he

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Netball.

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Sean Nuneviller look him up, he's cute.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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