Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

i have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

This is a joke for Homeless people:

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Whats 9 + 10 19

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Politics.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

What do you pull when it's hailing. Your favorite electronic.

thumb_up thumb_down +116

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +112

knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down +96

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops