A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

The AIDS patient was gay

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

a Jewish preist grew up in a black family. what do you call them? a loving family.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

What did the atheist say when he was in the church? The eulogy for his best friend.

My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

Knock knock, come in.

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

9/11

Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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