I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

Yo mama is so dumb, she makes blondes look smart!

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

How Long is a Chinese man.

a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

The AIDS patient was gay

Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Knock knock, come in.

my names jim haha

A black man without problems.

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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