how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

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A black man without problems.

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my names jim haha

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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