Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

Women's rights.

Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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