Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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knock knock. no one's home..

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i have cancer

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

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how did the fat guy fall off the swing? the chain on the right side broke because of is eccesive weight that he probably should have lost last year on biggest loser.

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what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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I like turtoes.

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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