A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the white supremacist stab the black man? He believed his race to be superior to that of the black man, thus he resorted to violence in order to display his supremacy.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

w8's white and speaks russian a russian stronk

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black person in the NHL

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

thumb_up thumb_down +1

"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops