What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what is white and red all over? a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Whats 9 + 10 19

thumb_up thumb_down -56

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

thumb_up thumb_down +119

What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

thumb_up thumb_down +97

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

hi im paul!

thumb_up thumb_down +61

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock Knock. Peep Hole!!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

pussy enough said

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops