Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

Why didn't Hellen Keller just wear glasses? Oh wait

What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

Rebecca Black's new album.

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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