roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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whats the difference between valium and m & ms ? one is,nt a tasty little chocolate

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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Your eye color is very unique.

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When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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In Soviet Russia, the government kills with famine and genocide.

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Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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your mom

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What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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where did the black person go poop ? in the toilet!

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why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

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a man walks into a bar and dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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