A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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That's as gay as AIDS.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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