a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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Why are elephants big, grey and wrinkled? Beacause if they where small, white and smooth, they would be an aspirin!!!

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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Your mother is so fat.

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What makes the antijokes on this site funny? Nothing.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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knock knock. no one's home..

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Why did the little girl cry A rabi slapped her and stole her ice cream

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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