Q: Jeff has 10 cookies, He eats 9. Now what does he have? A: Diabetes, Jeff has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

thumb_up thumb_down -13

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

thumb_up thumb_down -133

MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

thumb_up thumb_down +118

What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +106

hi im paul!

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops