Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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Your mother is so fat.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

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Roses are red Violets are red I stabbed the gardener.

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

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Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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