( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

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A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

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your mom

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equality for women

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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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2+2= 478

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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SOCIOPATH SAYS: Bitch, rate all my comments thumbs up, if you do I wont rape you... YOu know unless I feel like, women kinda like it when men are in touch with their feelings... SO yeah... Im gonne touch your feelings ;) Nah, nope, no homo, you a gal? We can meet! Voluntary rape! (No I did not say voluntary sex, rape, you can say the saferword: OMG SO GOOD HARDER HARDER! If I you know... Am about to kill you... Which I will do if we get to that stage anyways... Relax ill recycle you. Moral: NeroMetal Think Recycling! Save our planet! ITS LIKE RAPING AND KILLING A PERSON!

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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