How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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What is black and beats up white people? a cop you racist!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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- Why did the black man turn off the TV when he saw 2 guys kiss each other? - He was late to the gay-party around the corner.

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Dick Chaney

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Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

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Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

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What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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Why did the young man have a young woman do cart wheels when he was in his tree house watching her do them on the ground? Who knows?He never shared his feelings.

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when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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A Pole walks into a Pole. They chatted for a while, talking about the good old times they had had together in Poland. They soon finished their conversations, and went seperate ways.

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

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What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

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Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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