A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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In Soviet Russia its very cold

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minorities

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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Your mother is so fat.

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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I like my girls like my wisky. Strong, tastes and the leading cause of liver damage.

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

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Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

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"Hey look, mommy! I'm a whale!" (child proceeds to pull a shotgun and create a blowhole in his head)

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And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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