A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

Q)whats pink and fluffy A)pink fluff

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

roses are red, violets are red, bushes are red, flowers are red, trees are red, my garden is red... HOLY CRAP MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face", the horse replies I have an extra 21st chromosome.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

Hello, nice to meet you.

I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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