when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

How do you make a black man cry? Kill his family

Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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