knock knock. no one's home..

How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

you know what they say... hydrate or die

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

What did Lil Jimmi received at his birthday ? A red fire truck and he loved it

When did the Chinese guy go to the dentist? At the correct time he had been allotted.

what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

Roses are read bacon is good poems are hard .........BACON

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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