When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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A hayride would be fun.

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What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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11111

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

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What's worse than people repeating a joke about a handicapped child and voting down original, funny, anti-material? Knowing that millions of cubic decimetres of precious air and thousands of tonnes of food are being wasted every day to sustain them...

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He was Jewish.

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops