What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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A hayride would be fun.

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the girl. Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He has cerebral palsy.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Itookasipasoda

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

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2+2= 478

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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