Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

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Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

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I like turtoes.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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