Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

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What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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What's worse then Obama? Nothing

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Hi Adam,

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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What's a pirate's favorite letter? R, but they are also fond of the C.

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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your mom

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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