A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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knock knock. no one's home..

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

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a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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i have cancer

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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Why is this website funny? Because it has jokes on it.

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I like turtoes.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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