A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Asian NASCAR.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How many perverts does it take to screw a lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

96

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Miami Heat.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Hi Adam,

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops