Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

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Hi Adam,

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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thumbs up!

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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Q:Want to hear a pizza joke? A: Never mind it's to cheesy.

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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