Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

thumb_up thumb_down -50

I saw a kid watching Harry Potter so I asked him "Do you like Harry Potter?" he replued "yeah" so I asked "do you want to be Harry Potter" he said "yeah"... ...so I killed his parents and locked him in a cupboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Why did the baby die? It got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

thumb_up thumb_down +61

A hayride would be fun.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops