How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

A horse walked into a barn...

A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suisidal

What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't; numbers cannot experience emotions.

What's green and has four wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

knock knock. no one's home..

Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

What's better than having an iPad? I don't know, I lost both my hands.

How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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