whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

A hayride would be fun.

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

Rebecca Black's new album.

Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

66

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

knock knock. no one's home..

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

Womens rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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