Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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who farted i did :]

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What's better than group sex? Gang rape

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

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why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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My wife has terminal cancer.

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops